The Most Beautiful Thing

I am staring at the most beautiful thing I have ever seen. She weighs 6 lbs. 7 oz, is 19 3/4” long, 36 weeks old, and is perfect. Her name is Addison James Gardner and she was born on July 10, 2005. Addy or Addie or Addi (not yet decided) for short and James was my great grandfather’s name. She has a very full head of dark hair and I think looks much like her daddy. And yes, I did say she.

Today is our first day at home. We left the hospital this morning and have had quite a week. Unfortunately, internet access was limited at the hospital so I have not been able to post the events leading to and her arrival until now.

As you know she made and attempt to join us at 34 weeks of age and I was put on meds to stop my contractions until I hit 36 weeks, which was on 7/7/05. I had my doc apt on Thursday and was taken off of the meds. Given that I was not dialated, I thought she would come in a couple of weeks, but did worry that it might be when my doctor was away on vacation. My contractions that I had been having really did not change when I stopped taking the medication. Saturday morning, I took Nugget and Uno (our 2 year old black lab) to the trail to run, as my doctor had given me permission to go back to my usual routine. We had a nice run around the lake, took Uno to the vet, and went home to waited for a call from Doug. Two days prior, I decided that I should go ahead and buy a webcam and camcorder for Nugget’s big day and figure out how to use it. Doug was supposed to call between 12 and 3 to test the webcam and see if we could get it to work. I had a guy from Best Buy coming over Saturday night to give me a tutorial on all of the fancy features of the camcorder and how to download it onto a CD to send to Doug after delivery. Three o’clock came and went and I thought maybe Doug forgot today was Saturday, as days are hard to keep track of there. I called my mom and sister to meet me at 4:00 at the nail place so we could all get a pedicure – a new monthly tradition we started last month. Around 5:30, after my toes were all pretty, my mom mentioned that I had not packed a bag for the hospital and we agreed that we’d meet Monday or Tuesday at my house and get that together. I went to run a couple of errands – I had a big training event at Gymboree on Sunday that we were hosting for several other Gymboree sites. Went to SAMS to buy lunch for Sunday and as I started to walk to the store, I had the sensation that my water just broke! No, no, I thought – I am just imagining things. Decided it was a good idea to just go to the bathroom before I started shopping and uh, I reconsidered whether that was such a good idea. I opted to drive home, called mom and asked her if she could come over now to help me pack my bag. I needed it before Monday. Once I got home, there was no question – my water had broken and Nugget was on the way. Fortunately, I had time to get a bag packed, learn how to turn on the camcorder and hit record, and I emailed Doug to tell him to call me as soon as he possibly could. I tried sending out a Red Cross message to him too and hoped that he would be able to check his email before Nugget was born.

My mom and I arrived at the hospital at 8:00. Excited, nervous, sad, happy, not ready, and anxious. My doctor was already there, which brought me great comfort. The contractions were fairly strong by now, but unfortunately I was not dialated at all. Epidurals are not allowed unless you are at least 3-4 cm dialated. My doc started me on petosin which is supposed to speed up labor and dialation, and also makes your contractions more frequent and stronger. Not overly fond of that idea but not much choice. Also unfortunate for me is that I discovered with respect for labor, I take after my mother. It is very slow. It took me about 11 hours to get to 4 cm and it was not pretty. My mom was a great coach and helped me through the wall climbing contractions (which is a nice way to describe them). Different breathing patterns I learned through sports and prenatal classes were my crutch. But what made the biggest difference was knowing that Doug was going to call and that we were going to have a family very soon. Doug had received my email and called around midnight. The reception was horrible, so we decided that if he called in an hour, there might be some progress to report and maybe we could hear better. The reception did not improve but he was able to call every hour. Not very eventful on his end – I gave reports and often made him sit through my, not so sexy, heavy breathing. He tried to breath with me a few times, which I of course took as him being a smart ass and told him that I could still physically hurt him in some way shape or form. No name calling though. I watched the clock as it rounded each hour and waited for him to call. At the blessed 5:30 a.m. on Sunday morning, when I reached 4 cm, I was given an epidural. Doug called at 6:00 and I was feeling much better, although I could not feel a thing, including the slightest hint of a contraction. He was going to wait a couple of hours before he called again so that I could get a bit of sleep before it was time to go. By 6:30-7:00 I was fully dialated. I had started to push but Nugget’s heart rate kept taking nose dives. After about 30 minutes of this, my doctor came in with the news that we were going to have to go in for surgery immediately. C-section was not something that I had wanted to do and I had already gone through the hard part of labor, but my doctor was worried, my mom was worried, and I was worried. I was rolled into surgery around 7:45-8:00 and the anesthesia was increased. I apparently am sensitive to drugs, as the amount of anesthesia took over me. I was still conscious but could not move any part of my body. I am grateful that I was alert enough to hear my doctor at 8:21 say that I had a healthy baby GIRL!! Shock and emotion overwhelmed me and I cried like I have not cried since I kissed my husband good-bye at the airport. My mom was crying with video camera in hand – we think she was filming Nugget’s first few minutes in this world. Doug called about 5 minutes after she was born and my mom answered the phone. I remember the phone ringing but wasn’t able to talk. My mom wanted to wait until I could tell Doug myself, but he heard Addison having her first good cry and mom told him he that he had a beautiful daughter. I passed out shortly after that while Nugget was cleaned up and my parents and Doug’s parents were able to look over our little girl.

Once I woke up, I still was not able to move my arms for several hours, but the nurses were able to place Addison along side me and allowed her to eat and spend a bit of time next to me. While I still could not feel a thing, it was an overwhelming moment that I will never forget.

We spent 5 days in the hospital. With the labor, surgery, and a mishap with my epidural – they wanted to keep me a few extra days. Today we are home. Addison is trying to figure out what “home” is. She is a wonderful sleeper at night and very anxious during the day. The pups – well, Jack ignores her and Uno is very, very curious and likes licking her toes. Mom has been wonderful and is staying with me for a bit. Doug’s parents, sister, brother, and sister-in-law are coming up for a visit this weekend to see the new family addition.

I thought that I would come home nervous and unsure. Granted, there is still much to learn and I still find myself not knowing how to soothe her, but I imagine that feeling will continue for her lifetime.

A girl – Doug and I have a daughter. The only thing that we need right now is for Addison’s daddy to be home and life will be complete.


Addison Just Born 


Addison all Cleaned up 


Addison Sleeping 


Addison & Mom 


Addison Coming Home 


Coming Home!